I was reading a new thread on SH about releasing a new snuff to be in stock soon, I have heard the phrase “people are people” But thought to myself " not all snuff is good snuff" which translates to; " to each his own " or “different strokes for different folks” What cliches do you use a lot or like? Or ones we haven’t heard of throughout the world, which is used in your country? (Try and keep it clean Ladies and Gentlemen) ( some may be hard to translate into English or lose its meaning… I know this is the case with German phrases) What cliches do you use a lot or like? Or ones we haven’t heard of used in your country?

Different strokes for different folks is one of my favorites.

‘In the land of the blind the one-eyed man is king’…That’s probably one of my fave’s at the moment ~O)

(something is) “as black as granny’s knitting bag” “he looked at me like my head buttons up the back” “as much use as a one legged man in an arse kicking contest”

“Sometimes even a blind squirrel gets a nut” “Use it or lose it” reality test: “How important is it?” “Whatever” while rolling your eyes

Schadenfreude!

“Insanity is to repeat the same thing over and over yet expect different results” “Nothing in biology makes any sense, except in the light of evolution” “Once you’ve eliminated the impossible whatever remains however improbable must be the truth”

No good deed goes unpunished The road to hell is paved with good intentions

Here’s a saying I made up: There’s two sides to every cushion but my ass can’t tell them apart.

Everything has an end, but the sausage has two.

From my great-grandmother’s storehouse of wisdom: don’t kick a gift horse in the face.

“YOLO”…You only live once… I got one from a friend yesterday, and I love it: “When you spell out the real meaning of ‘community’, there are no big i’s or little u’s”. I’ll be using this alot…great way to say to keep Egos in check.

but there is a little u. its between the m and the n

^ I was just about to say that

but there is a little u. its between the m and the n

Waiting for someone to say that! =)) @firestarter0 gets the “quick on the draw” kudos for today!

I don’t use cliches. I avoid them like the plague. I’ll tell you what my least favourite phrase is - it’s when you signed in just two minutes ago, making sure the “keep me signed in” option is ticked, and you try to post a reply but get “you don’t have permisson to do that” because for some reason you’ve been booted out again! Guess why I’m saying that… >:P

It is what it is

“I’m just going out - I may be some time”. Came to mind because I’ve had to sign in six more times since my last post.

“I’m just going out - I may be some time”. Came to mind because I’ve had to sign in six more times since my last post.

bookmark page?

Good friend who passed used to say if we got lost driving somewhere " we are lost but we are making good time"

don’t diy,hire a professional! Everyday is great on this side of the turf It’s better to be seen then viewed Live every day as if it’s your last somewhere a village is missing it’s idiot If brains were dynamite ,you couldn’t blow your nose everyone is stupid until they learn more than you Nothing happens if you do nothing GOYA - get off your ass Keep coming back! Living on borrowed time

I never laughed so hard as when I seen a lawyers office with the slogan “We will get you off today!”

Vaginas are for sharing.

Hang in but let go

Vaginas are for sharing.

Like hell they are! you’d best keep your hands away from my vaginas @stapf! I’m keeping an eye on you

“Even a clock the don’t work is right twice a day”

“Even a clock the don’t work is right twice a day”

How you been? @3_D …just a thought…but I could walk or run with that broken clock in hand, back and forth in a few same states and it would show correct time 4 times a day… having that mindless task would almost be as good as my mindless post…lol… KEEP ON KEEPING ON SNUFFING :^o

Good @AANYCAARDS You, That one goes with “Even a blind squirrel finds a nut now and then”

Good @AANYCAARDS You, That one goes with “Even a blind squirrel finds a nut now and then”

SUPERB! Thanks for asking… Heard that blind squirrel saying all to many times at the poker table…( nut is known as the best hand possible in a given poker hand )

One that I use often is “Don´t pee on me and tell me it´s raining”

From my father: “It sticks out like an outhouse in the fog.”

If at first you don’t succeed, try playing second base!

"I could tell you - then I’d have to kill you! and also - “If it looks like **** and it smells like **** - it’s ****!”

the second mouse gets the cheese

“Four sheets to the wind” (drunk as a skunk) “Three sheets to the wind” (well on your way to being intoxicated)

When life gives you lemons…shove them down his throat screaming “How do you like it, bitch!”

Here’s the one that I use most often: Patience is a virtue.

“Its all caddywhompus.” For when things are out of order. My favorite for when things are not there best-“Don’t take life to seriously, no one makes it out alive anyway.” This one puts things in perspective.

@n9inchnails I always heard “if life gives you lemons find someone who’s life gave them vodka”

Oh and “dreams are for suckers” thanks dad

I don’t use cliches. I avoid them like the plague.

That second sentence has become a cliche.

When I speak with clients, I love “deferring” a tough question with, “We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

ANGER is one letter away from DANGER

I prefer “we’ll burn that bridge when we come to it” but if your dealing with clients I guess your’s is more appropriate

I don’t use cliches. I avoid them like the plague.

That’s what I like to see… Somebody else with my love of irony! Guess the rest of ya’ need more liver in your diet!

Then there’s: “Whatever floats your boat!”

Dog is God spelled backwards(it is, try it).

It has been said that for evil men to accomplish their purpose it is only necessary that good men should do nothing. ~Edmund Burke

I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

6 in one, half a dozen in the other.

…said the actress to the bishop.

It’s better to be sh*t at and missed, than to be shot at and hit. :)>-

You can never have too much snuff, or pipe tobacco.

I am amused at the idea of non-snuffers “turning their nose up” at our form of tobacco pleasure…

@PotPoe Take that a step further: Consider the poor, restless, dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac who lay awake wondering if there was a dog…

• See more at: http://snuffhouse.org/discussion/7621/anyone-interested-in-a-snuff-google-hangout#latest For @AANYCAARDS “Just because your paranoid, doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you”

I see said the blind man, to his def son, over the telephone, as he hung his wooden leg out the window to check for rain.

“I see”, said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw.

Got a face like a bag of spanners, and mad as a bowl of fish

Deaf as a haddock

Edited-wrong thread

Edited-wrong thead Huh weird I don’t know why this posted twice

@distained oh man! you are just so full of cliches!

That’s about as funny as a two story outhouse!

Only the good die young! your going to be around a long time He whom smell it, dealt it You don’t have to be insane to work here, but it helps Everywhere I look I see stupid people Those whom think they know it all , really annoy those of us whom do hind sight is 20/20 Best ever- Row,row, row your boat gently down the stream,merrily,merrily,merrily,merrily life is but a dream

As a technical writer trying to set a good example, I often quote this one" I ain’t never made but one gramatical error in my life and I seen it when I done it and I taken it back!

Has someone said “dumb as a bag of hammers”? “smoke 'em if you’ve got 'em” (I usually would hold them to their word) “The people who say it can’t be done should not get in the way of those who are doing it”(it may be out of place, but I like it) My own saying: “crazy as a box of chickens”

That’s just _ silly…_ Who would ever eat a bag of smoked hammers?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I03UmJbK0lA

@basement_shaman…thanks for posting that video… Extremely funny…I recall a breathe strip commercial of the same lingo…so KMARTS ad agency definitely ripped off the original idea… But all in all, KMART has some Kahonez ( balls ) to produce that… Never did see that aired on TV though.

Here’s one, I haven’t used in years, just thought of it; If IT’s and BUT’s were CANDY and NUTS, everyday would be another freaking XMAS.

Out of all of the things that I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.

‘It’s better to be silent and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt!’

Listen to how one speaks of others, this is how they will speak of you.

Anger and judgement are a heavy bag, you have to let them go to move forward.

‘It’s better to be silent and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt!’

I often use this quote myself, but I always give credit to Poor Richard (Ben Franklin) for coining it.

If wishes were horses, all of the street sweepers would be millionaires!

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. Mark Twain

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way. Mark Twain

^ you learn cats have claws and they’re sharp!

All generalizations are false, including this one. Mark Twain

Never say “Never!”

As a general rule, I don’t believe absolute statements.

“Dumb like a fox!”

“I grumbled because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.” – My grandfather

Even an ***hole is necessary… Without one we would all be dead in a week!

…that reminds me of one of my very own that I have used a few times in various community based organisations … “Whenever you get a body of people, it becomes just that - a body. By which, I mean it has a head and it has an arsehole. Remove either one and it very soon grows another to take it’s place. Likewise, if it had too many heads or too many arseholes, it plunges into disfunction often splitting into more than one body with one head and one arsehole in each”

We make a perfect couple… She’s a sadist and I’m a masochist!

Ancient Chinese proverb-Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day

you hit bottom when you stop digging!

He who go to bed with itchy butt, wake up with stinky finger.

You always find it in the last place you look

You always find it in the last place you look

I looked everywhere for it! It was in my hand. 8-|

If I get back, before I return. Keep me here.

Old Chinese Blessing and/or curse: May you live in interesting times.

dammed if you do, so you my’s well

You can’t spell slaughter without laughter

Don’t rush through life, you’ll never make it out alive. :(|)

Sometimes this job is like hearding cats!!!

We’re off like a herd of birds.

^flock, birds don’t herd

He who stands on toilet is high on pot

Mahalo!

useless as a screen door on a submarine

useless as a screen door on a submarine

Or a elevator in a outhouse.

I’ll have a coke.

Here I always thought that it was: Never drink on an empty stomach!

Words of wisdom from my pappy: When you go into a bar, pick out the ugliest crow that you can find… When she starts looking good to you, you know that you’ve had enough!

Always do whatever’s next. Not only do I not know what’s going on, I wouldn’t know what to do about it if I did. George Carlin

There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist. Mark Twain

Family; it’s not a word, it’s a sentence.

Life doesn’t offer you promises whatsoever so it’s very easy to become, ‘Whatever happened to… ?’ It’s great to be wanted. I spent a few years not being wanted and this is better. Morgan Freeman

“If you choose the lesser of three evils you’ve still chosen evil”

Attacking people with disabilities is the lowest display of power I can think of - Morgan Freeman.

Where there’s a will there’s a way. Another that goes alongside that one I heard from my stepdad: Excuses are like assholes-everyone has one and they all stink.

About as useless as a T-shirt with no pocket.

There’s a big difference between happy, and healthy.

Don’t believe anything

The rumors of my insanity have been greatly exaggerated, and my dexterity can’t get that last buckle. Has anyone seen my crayons and helmet?

Wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which gets filled first. What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger. Life is like a sewer: what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.

I don’t suffer from insanity,I enjoy every second of it! 8-}

alls well that ends well

some are fearful where there is nothing to fear,and some are fearless where there is much to fear…

“If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.” ― J.K. Rowling

“I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.” ― Douglas Adams

"If I wanted to be a piece of sports equipment, “I’d be a ladies bicycle seat”. - Jackie Mason, Caddyshack 2

I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He’d just pick up the couch and walk out of the room. Don Rickles

Marry for the money

Parachute for sale; never opened, used once, small stain.

Odd story on this topic. So I work with a Taiwanese woman here at my office. One day discussing software release practices she said “Well, you know, there is more than one way to eat a cat.” It made me chuckle retelling that story again a month later… But it also made me ponder why the hell skinning cats was such a common place topic that an idiom about multiple ways to skin a cat would be an effective way to tell people there are numerous acceptable choices on something… So in a way the original saying is probably every bit as messed up as the mistranslation by my coworker… Ken

“If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all” esp when talking about people.

'Do you want to know who you are? Don’t ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you…Thomas Jefferson

Reading something on this forum just now (Not gonna say which thread) a phrase sprang to mind “Casting pearls before swine” (Doesn’t necessarily mean it is relevent, just that it sprang to mind) ;

The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which neither time nor eternity can bring diminution - this everlasting living soul, began. My mind loses itself in these depths. Groucho Marx

If you want to be happy – be a PESSIMIST… Things will either turn out as well as you expected or BETTER! Sounds like a sure fire plan, doesn’t it?

Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted. Groucho Marx

Two phrases that clearly show my roots are: “Ain’t it?” (Milwaukee) and “Don’cha know…” (New England)

“The parts of me that used to think I was different or smarter or whatever, almost made me die.” ― David Foster Wallace

“I would rather be a little nobody, then to be a evil somebody.” — Abraham Lincoln

In times of distress remain calm

“PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON’T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT PEOPLE LIKE ME AS A MEMBER”. -Groucho Marx

“PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON’T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT PEOPLE LIKE ME AS A MEMBER”. -Groucho Marx

:-j one of my faves

KRUSTY THE CLOWN And now, in the spirit of the season: start shopping. And for every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold.

"Be carefull what you wish for, you might get it "

Don’t believe anything you hear and only half of what you see

If you can’t be good be good at it

Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it. Mark Twain

There is no gap between your mind and mine

It better to give a resentment than to harbor one

The difference between something that can’t possibly go wrong and something that might go wrong is that when something that can’t go wrong does go wrong, it’s usually impossible to fix.

Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not, remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.

When people of the female persuasion ask: “How are you?” My standard response is: “Much better now that I’ve seen you!”

My grandfather used to say of someone with luck at the races “if he fell from the top of st.Paul’s (cathedral) he’d land in a new suit”

If it ain’t broke – don’t fix it!

my favourite : The people who say it can’t be done should not get in the way of those who are doing it

A couple of Australian sayings, As shifty as a shithouse rat with a gold tooth. As ugly as a hatfull of arseholes.

When someone says, “I wish that…” You respond, “Wish in one hand and crap in the other. See which one fills up the fastest.”

“What comes around, goes around.”

Also, “Looked at me like a cow looks at a passing train.”  Example: “I explained it to him, and he looked at me like a cow looks at a passing train.”

If you’re gonna be a lamb, you might as well be a sheep.

“humans are just wolves with large brains that act only out of self interest”

Just As Soon To As Eat A Bug!  

“When I want your opinion, I’ll give it to you”.

“If no fit use spit” “Smoke,Choke,Poke”

If someone asks me a question then takes exception to my answer, I’ll often respond… “If you don’t want the answer, don’t ask the f*cking question!” If I suspect the answer will offend before giving it, then I’ll use the same phrase before answering. If they still insist on the answer and then still take offence, then it’s time to get really patronising. Other favourite’s include: “The problem with common sense, is that it’s not very common” “Trust me, I’ve got a beard” “If at first you don’t succeed - amend, abort, or cheat!”

One from my dad:

“Life is like a sh*t sandwich. The more bread you got, the less sh*t you gotta eat!”

“Go tell somebody who actually gives a f*#@”. That’s all mine, that.

^ I have a similar one

“You seem to be missing the part where I care”

Or… when someone won’t take no for an answer - “which part are you struggling with, the ‘n’ or the ‘o’”?

Never take laxatives and sleeping pills at the same time.

You know why there are so many asshat’s in the world, because it is illegal to kill them !

Live right, exercise, eat healthy, die anyway!

I am going to hell that is where all my friends are.

The fing your getting now and worth the fing you’ll get later.Don’t buy the cow,Hookers are cheaper.

When the US post office is stocking up on ammo, I think that a good sign you should too!

“Thanks to denial, I’m immortal.” --Philip J. Fry

You can’t educate mince.

You can’t fix Stupid !

“When the aliens come, they will take the fat ones first”

“Every1 Hates a winner”! Expecially when you’re the loser. I got that one from my brother-in-law when he used to beat me in Billiards at my own house.

Igne Natura Renovatur Integra - Through Fire, Nature Is Reborn Whole

Who pay the money, they order the music.

Friend in need, friend indeed.

If you don’t have something nice to say… keep your big fat mouth shut (Or keep your fingers away from the keyboard, as the case may be)

More cushion for the pushen

Doesn’t matter what you vote, nothing changes. Some taxes go up, some go down. Democracy only means you get to choose the public figure who’ll f*** you in the a**.

Nothing is so bad it’s not good for something.

Fear the wrath of a patient man!

Do to other people as you want other people to do to you.

“Something will turn up”, quoting Micawber from David Copperfield.

Ende dispereert niet, alles sal reg kom. Quotes from Jan Pietersz Coen, fouder of the Dutch East Indies and Paul Kruger president of Transvaal.

My Brother Ronnie ALWAYS told me “Keep the faith”. And it stands true today. Since his passing 2 years ago, I have gotten it tattooed on my right forearm, along with his one and only tattoo, a Western cowboy riding a Stallion.

I see it everyday and remember to live the way he did, never back up, never let down, stand for your rights as a human, as an American and most of all, as a warrior.

When describing people with a W.C. Fields type of nose.

                                  “He’s got a nose like a blind cobblers thumb.”

Some of my favourites: Freedom is free but it is not cheap. Simple doesn’t mean easy. The path is the obstacle. Sometimes your greatest failures are your greatest advances. When there is no way out, there is still always a way through. Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination. A bird may love a fish but where would they build a home together? It’s always easier to get forgiveness than permission A hen can lay a golden egg but she still cant sing.

“Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades”

I will not tip-toe through life only to safely arrive in deaths arms.

Hell is what you go through and heaven is what you make it.

This is the real secret of life – to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play.

Life exists only at this very moment, and in this moment it is infinite and eternal. For the present moment is infinitely small; before we can measure it, it has gone, and yet it persists forever.

@ParlousState You forgot nuclear bombs and sex in that phrase.

@nicmizer:

As my mother used to say: “bulls…t baffles brains” --applicable to many [though not all]  bureaucracies, staff meetings, school assignments etc…

I’m also a big fan of ‘fools and bairns shouldnae see half-finished work’.

Comes to mind often with prototype development (I work in IT) …

UK members of a certain age will remember the  "St Trinians " films.   A girls boarding school, run by dubious teachers, with equally dubious pupils. 

 I think it was Dora Bryan (one of the teachers)  talking about teaching the girls the three  r’s,   reading, righting and rithmetic.

                    “I always tell the girls, its nice to have your    r’s    to fall back on.”

Just a few quotes from my favorite movie.

“This pretentious ponderous collection of religious rock psalms is enough to prompt the question, ‘What day did the Lord create Spinal Tap, and couldn’t he have rested on that day too?’”

“You can’t really dust for vomit.”

“Dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It’s just not really widely reported.”

“I believe virtually everything I read, and I think that is what makes me more of a selective human than someone who doesn’t believe anything.”

“We’ve got Armadillos in our trousers. It’s really quite frightening.”

“As long as there’s, you know, sex and drugs, I can do without the rock and roll.”

own a gun you can rob a bank

own a bank you can rob everyone! 

Give a man a fish and he will eat it

Give a man a fishing pole and he will sit around all day drinking beer

If you like to take control over the circumstances you have to submit to the common sense. (Seneca)

Texas local dialects ABOUND with little phrases like this, there are even books about them. Some of my favorite (I realize now that they are utterly incomprehensible to some people) phrases from my region, are 
“all hat and no cattle”

“rode hard and put up wet”
“it’s raining like a cow pissin on a flat rock”

“I’ve been busier than a one-legged man at an ass-kicking contest”
“you can put your boots in the oven, but that don’t make 'em biscuits”

“can’t beat that with a stick!” 
“welp, it’s better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick”
“close enough for gov’ment work”

“If he says a hen dips snuff, you’ll find the can on her.” (Thought I’d include a topical one)
“Don’t tell me how the cow ate the cabbage”
“ain’t my first rodeo”
“back when I was knee-high to a grasshopper”

“I’m chawin at the bit”
“let your guns cool off first”

“dumb as a box of rocks”

“that dog won’t hunt, son”

“bout as worthless as tits on a boar hog”

“looks like ten miles of bad road”

But my personal favorite has to be “sometimes too much is just enough…” (after a huge meal, or getting dressed up, or asking for one more beer." 

If it smells like fish it’s a dish

If it smells of cologne leave it alone 

“I will try anything twice.”

‘‘Opinions are like arseholes: everyone has one, yet thinks that everyone else’s stinks’’.

‘‘When you’re dead you don’t know you’re dead, the pain is felt by others. The same thing happens when you’re stupid’’.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

“Sometimes you just have to pee in the sink.” (Bukowski)

@_A_   You just reminded me of one that I have used when people are spelling words aloud when filling in crossword puzzles.

"   The P is silent,  as in jakuzzi.  "                    

If I agree with you we will both be wrong!

An evergreen favourite of mine is

WHOSE ROUND IS IT ?

I built a few commercial dive boats in Curacao from 2006 to 2011. I was installing two big mid engine turbo diesels in a 50 footer with a full hard top/patio above. I had to lift the boat 8 feet out of the water with a travel lift and a 2nd crane would reach in (now that it had a successful angle) and set them in place. So the local crane operator was banging these expensive engines on everything in sight and I was starting to lose my cool, running around checking this and that. My helper (an older local gentleman) quietly strolled over and softly said… 

“sometimes baby, that’s just the way life is”

 lol, I started cracking up and now I use it in every uncontrollable moment in life.